Saying "I'm Sorry"

Yes, I am talking about apologizing…. Not an easy task, especially doing it correctly. It is in all of us trying to be “right” all the time. And admitting to be wrong isn’t that simple.  For me, being able to apologize without getting defensive is a big success because it is not easy.  I watch my kids EVERY DAY when they try to apologize.  Even at age 5, it is a tough task!  There are times when the embarrassment of the mistake turns into a blame or a melt down when all it is needed is a simple “I’m sorry” with no need for further explanation.

The biggest challenge is to show case to the kids the correct ways of apologizing.  It is not as simple and as frequent as showing them how to say “please”.  There are less examples all around them.  Of course, as parents we are the most effective examples.  But I do think that it is a tough task for grown ups too, to be able to say “I’m sorry” when a mistake is made.  For some reason, it is always easier to say “I’m sorry but…”. Over the last few years, I had plenty of practice to apologize to the kids.  I do try to bring my learnings from the “kids apologies” to the “grown-up apologies”.  I know that there is still a lot more to learn to apologize correctly.

The interesting thing about the phrase “I’m sorry” is that it can be used in a different context than apologizing for a mistake.  Where as in Turkish, the phrase for apologizing ONLY means a true apology for a mistake or a wrong doing.  This month, I received a lot of text messages and emails with the words “I’m sorry”.  However, they all meant that they were sad about the earthquakes in Turkey and that we lost a family friend.  It was not their mistake that the earthquakes happened.  Having multiple meanings for the same phrase definitely makes it even more challenging for me to use it appropriately. (excuses…)

The key thing about a good apology is being able to admit the wrong doing.  So why don’t we start practicing THAT!  Think about your body for this past month (or just the past day).  What did you do wrong with it?  Did you slouch while sitting on your office chair?  Did you feed it unhealthy food? Did you wear uncomfortable shoes? Think of just ONE wrong thing you did to your body. And APOLOGIZE!  Basically you are apologizing to yourself, but please, mean it! Now this month, try not to repeat that mistake/wrong doing. Can you do it? Just for one day or for one month, try not to repeat your mistake.  It will not be easy but it will definitely be rewarding.

I can’t wait to hear from you about your ways of apologizing.

High Five to all of us, for TRYING!

THANKS to my dad for being the best driver, despite all my CRITICISMS. (I am sorry, Baba)

congrats to kaya in getting 2nd place in his ski race. (I am sorry, oglum, for being surprised to the results)